5- To you, what is art? What classifies something as abstract art?
Abstract art can be anything dream like I think. It doesn’t have to make sense. It doesn’t have to make something real. Like this painting is just lines, circles and curls. But it still has its own beauty.
Anyone can take pictures. I really, really, really, really, REALLY hate people who have albums calling it their photography and their art. No, it’s not fucking art. You’re just taking pictures. You do not have the eye for it. When cameras were first created, only photographers were the ones with the eye for things. Then they came out with disposable kodak cameras and now anyone could simply snap pictures of anything. That’s not being a photographer! That’s JUST taking pictures of things! There’s such a fucking difference in it and it pisses me off!! Raahhh!!!
3- What are some things that can almost always make your day better? Do you find yourself having a lot of bad days, or mostly good days?
Music usually makes my days better. Blink 182 and Coldplay to be exact. I just feel when they play, my day will always be good. I only have one friend at the moment and she makes me laugh like I haven’t seen her in years when we do stupid shit together.
I do find myself having bad days. Work is stressing me out, not having money, making sure I pass these classes in college, Doug dumping me every month. Breakups are very hard on me and you can’t expect someone to not be pissed off at you when you’ve been together for 7 months. If it was only a month and that was the end, I wouldn’t be as pissed but come on, 7 months, on and off. I feel stupid and my mind’s been played with. You also can’t say you didn’t play with someones mind when you can’t decide if you want to date or not and use the SAME GODDAMN EXCUSE EVERY FUCKING TIME. Just tell me the goddamn truth instead of saying the same bullshit. I don’t want to hear it!!!
I wish I could have good days. I wish I was lucky in life where I didn’t ever have to have a bad day ever again. I want to stay happy. Not have it taken away from me billions of times.
2- How well do you do around blood? Does it make you squirmy?
I don’t mind it actually. I’m kind of a macabre person. I’ve done photoshoots with fake blood and look up murder pictures because I find that stuff very interesting. I’ve never passed out or thrown up from it before but I went with my one friend, Army Chris, so he could get his tongue pierced. The guy tried to pierce it but he moved his tongue then he started to bleed. That has never bothered me before but I felt like passing out. So I don’t know why that happened since it doesn’t bother me. Now if I saw a big puddle of blood and dead bodies in person, I can’t say how I would react if I did see them.
I could probably go on forever about dreams. I have always had the most intense, realistic, insane, disturbing yet amazing dreams. The earliest dream I remember having was when I was a child and I was and still am, afraid of bees. In the dream I walked into a wooden, kind of broken down house where my mom, dad and someone else was sitting around a table. They were eating bread and ha a stick of butter. When they cut into the butter, I tried to stop them because bees would fly out of it and swarm them. They seemed to not pay attention to the bees as they ate the bread, butter covered bees. Within seconds, they turned into these giant yellow jackets. I opened the broken screen door, running down a dirt road with these giant bees chasing me. That’s the end of that one. It has reoccurred quite a few times and it’s a very odd thing to dream about.
Another reoccurring dream is zombies. They not literally haunt, but take over my dreams so many nights. They are always different. In different situations. With different people. And usually not the same weapons. In every single dream, besides one, has been like the game Left for Dead. I kill every single one and win every time. Only one dream when I watched my ex play Deadrising, was it different. I actually had a hard time fighting them off as they grabbed me. It was a bit of a struggle. I really want to know why zombies like my dreams so much.
The thing that has always scared me about my dreams is the scenario may not always be the same in real life, but they come true. I have had dreams about past exs cheating on me and lying to me then I would find out a few days later my dreams were actually true! It scares the shit out of me. I had two horrible dreams last night about the last guy I was with. I don’t ever ever want those to come true, even though the second will eventually. He WILL find someone and I can’t ever stop that. I guess you could call these dreams premonitions. When I have these dreams, the only person I tell is Jesse because she doesn’t think I sound crazy for having dreams like this. But other than her, I tend to keep them to myself so whoever doesn’t think I’m making it up at the time. I could never lie about something that would freak me out so badly.
Another dream that had freaked me out recently was a pregnancy dream. I have never had one before. It was extremely realistic. But I am not with my ex anymore and I obviously am not so that didn’t come true. In the dream I was walking towards a bathroom, nervous. Since the dream didn’t start off somewhere else and was me pacing around a bathroom, it was confusing to my dream state. Then as if I was actually holding the test and looking at it myself, and not in 3rd person like I normally dream, I looked at the sign and it was positive. Then it went back to me watching myself pace more, crying and freaking out because of how I would tell Doug. I’m very happy that dream didn’t come true. For how many times he has dumped me, that would be the worst thing.
Like I have said in the beginning, none of my dreams are ever normal. They jump around a lot, very colorful, very rapid. I kind of wonder if maybe all my thoughts throughout the day, subconsciously moosh themselves into one weird dream.